Just Don't Feel like it!!

So, I have this rule. If I am going to sit at the computer for hours on end and avoid working or looking for gainful employment, I have to write something – anything. Some days I write four or five blog posts save them in a folder and post them during the week. Some days, I just read everyone else’s blogs and pretend I don’t have time to do my own. Or I use the excuse I can’t get to my keyboard because of this…(which is supposed to be a picture of my daughter's latest rescue. He plops right on my desk in the middle of whatever I am doing and takes a nap! For whatever reason the picture has decided not to leave my camera and join the blog today. Yeah technology is a wonderful thing...) It really is difficult to work around him. We all have something stowed away in the excuse drawer.

The issue is honestly I don’t feel like looking for a job right now. Every one I try, I get no response or a we weren’t looking for you email. No one is really looking at the resume or reading the cover letter. And I am getting really tired of being rejected. It gets to the point of “why bother?” Ok there is that whole we need the money thing but other than that.

I try to stay positive. I am positive this is going to be a long haul. I am looking for the spin here. How do I turn this into something for me and anyone listening (reading) into a teaching/learning moment? I am not sure what I am going to learn from this. I don’t know what to teach then.
Perseverance is going to be a big one. I know with all the competition out there for every job posted I will be one of maybe 100 applicants. I have to keep at it. I have to write each cover letter independently. I have to rework the resume as needed for each posting. I am not fabricating my work history or experience. I am simply reorganizing with different emphasis as the job description dictates. This is a lot of work. And I get really bored after the first couple of times during the day.

I have a feel now for which jobs not to apply to due to the wording of the posting. I also understand which ones are posted but aren’t really available. Those are the ones where someone within the organization has already been chosen for the job but for the legal process to be followed the job has to be advertised and a few interviews held.

I have been on a couple of those recently. The interviewer is looking at the clock behind your head for the whole 28 minutes, talking to his hands about the organization, and doesn’t ask a single useful question. You leave knowing full well that you just wasted the time, gas and dry cleaning bill to make his records appear compliant. Those are the ones you want to look at the creep and say, “Why did you make me come here? You knew you weren’t going to hire me. Couldn’t we have done this non-interview on the phone? Saved us both a lot of time and money.” But, professional courtesy says you can’t do that. Whatever, hope your “new hire” doesn’t work out…. OK not really but what about my time and expense? It is as important to me as yours is to you Mr. Non-interview Man or Woman. Had one of those recently too.

I broadened my idea of a good job and did more searches with the new criteria. I found a few more possibilities but no more solid responses. It is difficult right now. I know some folks that have been looking for work for months. I am hoping, really hoping it doesn’t take that long. We are not independently wealthy people. We need regular incomes to survive. Hubbing is working as much overtime as they will give him. But, that is so not fair to him. He deserves his days off like everyone else does. He will keep at it as long as he can I know. I just don’t know how long that is. I am concerned for his health and well-being. He works in a high stress field. Downtime is imperative for him as it is for all first-responders.

I will keep looking. And I will try to stop whining so much. I just wish it wasn’t so demoralizing.
On we go!

The Upsides of Unemployment

Ok there are some upsides to unemployment. Really, after the first week I have discovered a few small but important positive aspects about being unemployed. Here they are in no certain order:

I go to the gym far more often. I love going to the gym. Physically pushing myself to go beyond my limits of strength and endurance feels good. I feel better, I notice subtle changes in strength already and am ready for more. I have maintained by membership over the last couple of years but my attendance has been sporadic at best. I don’t have any excuses now.

I don’t have to laundry on the weekends. I can do it as I have time – any time. No more spending hours on Saturday and/or Sunday loading the washer, moving the heavy wet clothes to the dryer, folding and carrying up the stairs to be put away. I have free time on weekends now. Not that I know what to do with it. But, I got it.

The house is a lot cleaner now. I have time to clean again. I can run the vacuum as it needs to be done. Not when I simply can’t stand the floors anymore. I can sweep when I can get the dog out of the way of the broom. The dishes don’t pile up in the sink. The bathrooms get wiped down a lot more often now too. It is amazing how nice things look when you have the time to take care of them.

Dinners are fun again. I have time to pull out the recipe books and magazines and find something new to create. Or visit an older one we have forgotten about. It makes for better meals and lets me putter around in the kitchen for hours on end. I said I could read a recipe – I didn’t say I was an expert at it.

I get to spend more time with my family. I sure have missed them a lot over the past couple of years. We live in the same house and spend very little time together. It has been very nice to see them every day and spend even a small amount of time with them. I am hoping to spend some time with each of them. If they can stand me…..

My daily food/munchie intake is much less. I have time to prepare meals and sit down to each them. I don’t need all those trail mix snacks and meal replacement bars that I have been eating for the last couple of years. When I try to eat like that now I feel stuffed. Yay…I can eat less and not feel deprived. I wonder how much of that was stress eating?

Oh yeah – my stress level is way down. I have not got upset with anyone nearly as easily as I have been. I haven’t had to play my “I am way too mad to do anything else” CD at all this week. And I haven’t wanted to maim anyone beyond recognition either. Life is getting better.

I don’t have to get dressed before 2 o’clock in the afternoon. I spend the morning working at the computer and being accosted by furry people. I go to the gym when my behind falls asleep and my legs are numb. After my sweatfest I take a shower, get dressed, do the hair and make-up thing. I am ready to start my day – at 2PM. Beats getting up at 5:45 AM any day.

And, DIY projects are not so bad. Husband and I got the back storm door up. Took three hours, a bit of swearing and little blood to accomplish it. But, it is up and functional and as a bonus it looks good. It operates better than the last one too. Points to Husband for that. He can be truly amazing sometimes.

Which brings us to the down side of unemployment. We will address those in the next post.

Journey through well everything

I don't have to worry about that job anymore. It is gone. I was not surprised - just disappointed.

I hoped he would have more courage and professionalism than he did. Apparently not! The search begins now for gainful employment.

I am trying to find the courage and commitment for my dreams. I don't know if I have it. This would be the perfect opportunity if I can find the strength. I am more afraid of the risk than the failure. Doesn't make much sense does it? We are given these opportunities so very rarely and yet we just miss them or ignore because of the risks involved....

I started keeping a list on the notepad on my desk. I write topics for upcoming posts as they occur to me. I tried keeping them in my head but they get lost up there. Some are humorous as this life just keeps getting funnier as I get older. Some are topical and deal with the news of the day. I glanced over the list before I started and found a couple that could be combined as well. So, I will have this to keep me busy and to keep me focused. I am going to practice here. Hone some skills and try to make this enjoyable for me and for you.

I can easily get lost in my own mind for hours at a time. I am attempting to let some of those thoughts and ideas out of the confined space there. If I can put them down here and learn how to organize them maybe it will help with the future. It feels like a situation where I just have to move forward. I have to get out of my own way and see where I can go with it.

As a side note, I am looking for a simple to use small digital camera. I am not good with too many dials and settings for operation. The one we have now I have never been able to use. So, if I can find an inexpensive, decent camera I will gladly post some photos and illustrations as I go on this journey.

Come along for the ride.... it will be entertaining anyway.